Take a Deep Breath...

I am out of breath. Not because I have been exercising (we all know I don't do that), but because it seems like my life is stuck in Fast-Forward and I can't slow down for a single moment. I graduate in May. I graduate in May. I graduate in May. (I just had a mild panic attack.) My semester is already full of homework, quizzes, readings, work, and even elections! And while I am struggling to catch my breath through the onslaught of 'busyness' that is now my life--- I am expected to make life altering decisions about my future?!

I used to think I knew exactly what I wanted in life. But as I stand at the precipice of the rest of my life, I am suddenly struck by the inability to make any decisions! After all, I'm only in my 20's. Isn't that still a child? A child shouldn't be forced to make such large decisions!

The other day I was speaking with a group of older women. I asked them when they felt "grown"? They all gave me an odd look and said, "Grown? You never feel grown. I'm 50 and not grown. "

With that in mind, maybe none of us should be forced of making such life altering decisions since we technically never grow up.

Or maybe, because we never grow up, we have the rare ability to rebound from the bad decisions that we make. After all, regardless of how many times I decided to jump out of my swing from the highest point, I always managed to get back up when I fell down.

Perhaps that isn't the best analogy. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I know I'm going to fall down. I know that my decisions will not all be good ones. I'll make some mistakes. So maybe all the huge questions I've been pondering (Where to go to Law School, Student Loans, Job Security, Health Insurance, etc.) are pretty irrelevant. So what if I get them wrong? Almost everything can be 'righted' in the end....right?

For the time being I guess I will try to take a deep breath. After all, decision making isn't possible when you're winded. :)